Three months into my maintenance chemo and last weekend I finally managed to take EVERY SINGLE ONE of my tablets, at the CORRECT times. This may seem a bit ridiculous but I have quite a few medications to keep up with, plus sometimes if I’m out I will miss an odd anti-viral here and there, as well as having to make up for a dose of my antibiotic late if I miss it.
I’m now firmly settled into the routine of going up to the children’s ward for my IV every month too. Last time my consultant and I even had a big heart to heart, which I really valued. It took them a while to get used to me knowing about my treatment and for them not to interact with me through my mum, but they are great now.
My half term was a rather chilled affair, I probably could have done more studying but equally I loved having the week to socialise and not stress. I was on the steroids as well so it was the best possible week to be all zombie-like in!
On the first of November I had my first ever driving lesson, which went better than I was expecting! Dad and I had gone to a car park to practise the day before (and managed not to fall out, which was a feat in itself!) so I felt quite prepared. I didn’t think the instructor would trust me to drive home on the first go but I made it, despite one unsure moment when I couldn’t work out why the car was making so much noise when I wasn’t moving (no it’s not broken, now foot OFF the gas!).
The college took the English Lit students on a trip to the globe theatre in London which was interesting- the best part was just hanging out with the people from the group and getting to know everyone a bit more!
Somehow a year has passed and we are back round to my brothers birthday. This time last year we had a lovely family day in the hospital playing pool and board games, I had my thinning bobbed hair and skinny but weak legs! I was stuck in hospital 35 miles away as they all went out for dinner without me, so that night I felt pretty frustrated with my whole situation. I don’t know if I will ever stop saying how brilliant it feels to be free from most of that limitation, because it still hits me whenever I think about it!
I use “most” of the limitation because I did have a blip the other day when I was walking home, limping from some weird muscular pain. I blame the steroids and their mood swing effect! You can’t help those moments when you just have a rant to yourself (or others) about how unfair it is that you have to go through this and suffer from the stupid aches and side effects and lose the hair you loved so that you have to go around with stupid short hair that doesn’t cover your ugly head shape. Well I don’t know if any other sufferers think like that but this is the inner monologue that happens to me! By the way, I should mention that I have nothing against short hair, I just REALLY miss my long bright blonde hair! It’s cathartic and necessary to get your feelings out in the open. On the plus side of it all, my hair is coming back decidedly curly, which I am so excited for. I am anticipating a full afro. Watch this space!
Aside from the angry zombie persona I become once a month everything is going fabulously. College is brilliant, I’ve met some great people there and am finally out living a proper life!